This question was asked of me this morning and while I help people back to self-confidence, it gave me reason to stop and think.
What does it mean to be confident?
For me, and I realise especially working with people of so different walks of life that we all have different definitions of confidence,
but for me, it is a state of mind.
It is when I am sure in what I do, I “know” I can do whatever I need to do, it is when I trust that I will not break under pressure and this knowledge gives me the strength to push past obstacles.
In a way, for me, being confident is having the strength to keep going and smiling about it!
Does that mean that I know everything, that I am a “know-it-all” who lets everybody know that she does?
Does it mean I know what I need to do always? Does it mean that I don’t ever hesitate or that I don’t think that I make mistakes from time to time?
No! It doesn’t!
It just means that I have enough experience to know that I don’t know everything, to know that I will make mistakes and that I will survive.
That whatever life throws at me, I will suffer AND I will reach the other side.
Why? Because I am still standing.
If you had met me only 10 years ago, you would have met a very controlled person, who would be so completely driven that she would exhaust you, just looking at her. From the outside, she had the perfect life and you would have hated her because she made everything look so easy.
But I can tell you, because I was her, it took so much effort and work to pretend to be confident. To pretend that everything was perfect and so easy! It was exhausting and it did me in!
Nowadays, I have a much more quiet confidence, born out of experience.
I want to say a true confidence. I know myself, I know my strengths and my weaknesses. I have grown I suppose.
From the outside, I am still happy, but I know that people see something else, and they say that I am more relaxed and open.
I know I am more confident that I have ever been, but how could I be more relaxed and more confident at the same time?
This is my definition of confidence: Knowing that I can do it!
What is your definition of confidence? How do you define confidence? How do you know someone is confident or not?
Let me know in the comment below!
And if you are not sure you are as confident as you could be, maybe we could discuss. See my 12 weeks to self-confidence program here and let’s discuss.
Joelle @ Joelle’s Practice