I have been asked recently to explain the concept of 6 human needs theory.
It would be way too long to explain in details but basically, based on years of experience and observation, they came to the conclusion that all human behaviour is guided by only 6 basic human needs which are
- Need for comfort
- Need for variety
- Need for significance
- Need for connection/love
- Need for growth
- Need for Contribution
The first 4 needs are our basic needs, all our behaviours are driven by those 4 needs, the last two needs are the need of the soul, one can only be happy if one learns and one gives back.
Those needs are true for the human people regardless of their origin, color, culture, religion.
Each individual has a hierarchy of needs, depending his or her own history and set of experience as well as the stage of life a person is in. It is clear that a your adult going through university will not have the same need than a 30 something, who is just married and is expecting a child. The former will likely be looking for variety/excitement and significance, while the latter will probably be driven by the need for connection and love and for comfort/safety.
One can meet each need in a positive or a negative way. For an example, in a couple, when communication breaks down, it is not unusual for one person in the couple to be trying to communicate while the other retracts. The person trying to communicate is likely driven by the need to connect and love. However as time goes by, and frustration and resentment grows, this person will tend to pick a fight in order to capture the attention of the other partner. By doing so, the person meets the need for connection and love, but in a negative way. In absence of any positive connection and love, people will turn to negative ways. Of course, this way of communication will likely push the other person further away but in the short term, there will be a connection.
There are millions of example for each need!
But it is the best way to start understanding a person and its environment. By identifying the main driving need, one can already understand the situation better and also offer advices that are likely to be heard and taken into account.
There is no magic, just some logic!
So if you are block in a difficult relationship or in a situation where you don’t think that there is a way out, it is time to seek out some help, book an appointment today and get started.